things happen for a reason

I was on the phone yesterday with a friend of mine who I met at a college conference a year ago. I think I've mentioned him before in my previous posts...maybe not outright but discreetly I know I have. It's surprising to think that even after a year, we've still kept in touch...which I find extremely strange since in all my previous experiences with trying to keep in touch with my retreat friends...I completely failed. Either way, there's been a lot about him that I've been thinking about lately. That probably sounds really weird and I'll do my best to try and explain.

I've brought it up with him numerous times that I found it strange that we still talked, considering the fact that we live absolutely no where near each other [he lives in Texas, I in Pennsylvania] and we act and talk as though we do. I guess before he never really thought of it as much, he just saw it as another opportunity to meet a new friend? Just yesterday though, he was sharing how he started beginning to realize just how strange our relationship was, in the sense that we talk as if we've been friends for a while now when we don't see each other at all. It got me thinking about something that my pastor mentioned a few weeks back, during one of our college bible studies. He was saying how God places certain people, certain events in your life for a reason, which I totally agree to. My question is, why has God placed this...dude...that I don't even see ever in my life and why have we still kept in touch???

The college conference, called One in Love [O.I.L. for short], is held once a year in my state in Montrose, PA. I had a very blessed time there last year and so decided that I would go again this year. My pastor, a month or so back had asked if I would be able to lead a certain role during on my church's joint retreats. I told him I'd pray about it first and let him know later on. On the one hand, I wanted to help out with retreat and be a part of it but on the other hand, I really wanted to go back to O.I.L. I guess that's when I started really evaluating why I wanted to go back to O.I.L. instead of going to help out at the retreat. Even though initially it wasn't my reason to go back, I felt as though having this relationship with my friend was sort of a drive for me to go back to O.I.L. so that I could see him again and that to me...was a big iffy. As much as I wanted to see him again, if I did go, I didn't want either of us to be a hinderance for each other during the conference. Ugh, even now, although I have decided to go, I'm still trying to be really cautious with what I say to him when I talk. God, I honestly don't know what to do with this whole...I don't even know what to call it.

Anyways, so yesterday while we were talking, I decided that maybe I should more clearly define our relationship? As in, just say that because this is a very strange relationship indeed, we need to be more cautious about how we act and what we say with each other. I didn't mention it to him yet but if the chance comes, I think will. I really, should be praying about this more.

This is all so new to me. I don't think I've ever cared so much about a guy's sprititual relationship than this and considering that I have many guy friends, I don't know, it just seems all so weird. I'm trying not to think about it so much and just give it up to God right now because I feel like, there are more important things to deal with at hand...although, this seems pretty important too...heh. I just really hope that if we do grow closer, that we'll both have this relationship Gospel centered and really push each other towards God. I really want him to grow more in Christ and I hope he'll wish the same for me and encourage me to do so [which I guess is something that we've been doing eversince we started talking but I mean MORE than...what...we've been doing? What am I even saying???]. I also really want this relationship to be pure and not misleading in any way. I don't us to hype it up to something that it isn't because it's only going to hurt us in the long run. I don't know. Prayer and scripture is what I need right now...as well as guidance from other people.


"Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus"

Turn your eyes upon Jesus
Look full in His wonderful face
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim
In the Light of His glory and grace